April 14, 2008

Esse to Introduce New Kimchi Filtered Cigarettes

Posted in Fake Korean News tagged , , , at 2:30 pm by stephshimkooo

For ages it seems, Koreans alone have known about the health benefits of eating kimchi: vitamins, minerals, good for well-being, and cancer prevention. It was only a matter of time before somebody applied these benefits to cigarettes. Song Min-gi, who runs a convenience store near the Kimchi Museum, spent years watching people walk out of the museum, buy cigarettes from him, and talk about the wonders of kimchi. Finally, the idea to combine the two hit him like an angry ajumma.

Executives at Esse quickly ran with the idea after Song presented the idea a few months ago. “They’re great! My wife used to nag me about how I smelled like smoke and soju when I came home.” Notes Song, “Now, she sniffs around and tells me to make sure the door on the kimchi fridge is closed.”

“Our customers don’t have to quit smoking because the kimchi in the filter will prevent all those toxins from getting into their lungs.” Lee Jong-Oh, a representative for Esse, says. “Not only does the kimchi filter block all those cancer-causing toxins, it gives you that kimchi-y, fresh from the sam kyeop sal restaurant feeling.”

Kimchi filtered cigarettes are now the engine of growth for Esse. We’ve seen sales increas at a remarkable rate,” Continues Lee. “It’s up 100% from a year ago before we carried the product. We expect this product to really increase our market share, and we’re very excited about it. Fighting Esse!

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